Update: I put the B in itch

Oh dear god, some days are just so nuts you can’t even get pissed because it is already crazy. The place is called Lavo, and it is a major tourist trap, on 58th and Madison. Loud and obnoxious. The waitress wants to tell us what to order. She insists on pushing this giant meatball with ricotta glop on top and when she leaves us alone I see it passĀ  us by and the thing already looks like a freaking tumor. I order a salad and I can see that both my aunt and the waitress are disappointed. As we are being served the fire alarm goes off as well as the strobe lights on every fire box on the walls. Waitress says no problem this has happened everyday this week. My aunt says we stay because the food is on the table. Did I mention that I have a premium brand kind of headache already?? The fire Department shows up with all their toys, and it is not the handsome brigade or maybe I’m just beyond cranky at this point. Alarm stops but strobe lights keep on flashing and the were still flashing when we left, after I was forced to eat a raspberry abomination (birthday lunch) after I managed to convince both my aunt and the waitress that I could not really eat a fried zeppole with an oreo inside (!!!). Oh, and this is my birthday gift:

That’s like two bottles of good perfume, or a case of really good wine, or whatever!!!

Un returnable because she is going to be looking for it next time she comes over. Is it bed time yet?

7 thoughts on “Update: I put the B in itch

    • Hijo, ya confese la ingratitud! It is beautiful but when she asked what I would like for my bday, I told her anything that won’t gather dust!! I have a Buddha Shakyamuni by my night table, another one on my altar, and a lovely one in my living area. She knows I did not need another one. But I understand that I must have played a part in how this went down… hahaha!

  1. What an adventure! Gifts from well-meaning relatives are often the most difficult to deal with. But hey, tomorrow will be a better day and……one can’t have too many Buddha statues, yes?

  2. oh, hahahahaha! how I enjoyed reading about your terrible day! Thank you for sharing :) As for your crystal Buddha, it takes me back to when my poor Mom did something similar by sending us two carved wooden statues of people in yoga poses … but they were completely missing their middle sections! Hard to describe but where their hara should be was missing. We loathed them but felt terrible about loathing them. They stayed in a box for many years and then some kid bought them at our yard sale. My Mom has a terrible memory so I am sure she never noticed they were no where to be found.

    Hey! That could be a garden Buddha! No weather issues with crystal… problem solved. You’re welcome.

  3. That rant helped me make peace with crystal Buddha. My aunt has a vicious memory (me too) and she will look for it next time she visits. She told me today she decided to get one for my mom’s and my sister’s birthdays as well. Misery loves company.

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