The background singers are the perfect chorus to my weekend. Three family parties back to back. One of them being my daughter’s “un-wedding” bash for family, tomorrow which has generated lots of blowback because of it’s laid back theme (Pizza) fancy pizza okay? Wait until they see that instead of cake I ordered doughnuts from Dough in Brooklyn. See ya on the other side!
In yoga news, last thursday O gave me an exasperated “Come on, Maria!!” on my seated vinyasa, which thrilled me because it must mean I’m closer??
My very first Garbha headbutt today against the lovely Corinne. Sounds like soccer right? We got a giggles attack that only stopped because we were already past exhausted. Teacher said that there was no reason not to have your arms through your legs in Garbha if you had done it previously. So in they went and with that my ability to maneuver as well. I have to say that I have matured when it comes to sharing space. Earlier in my “career” I would have freaked out if someone put their mat as close to mine as C did today. But that is the beauty of being part of a consistent yoga community, even without thinking, we synchronized our arms to rise consecutively by turns during the Surys and it all worked out until I lost control of my vehicle in Garbha Pindasana. It was all noise no pain fortunately. Yoga weather has arrived, because it was a steam bath led primary with really out of the ordinary forward bends. You know what I mean. Happy Friday all, I’m having a glass of red tonight: Snowden Cabernet Sauvignon 2009, I hear it is unbelievable. And tomorrow too. Celebrating Mother’s day can take an entire weekend.
My shala will be celebrating it’s ten year anniversary next month with a party AND a 30 day practice challenge. My emotional development is such that I get shit done mostly through threats/dares/procrastination. I also just read a very good blog entry on how people OD on cleanses/challenges/and upping the ante during these spring months. Whatever. I am going for the level one challenge: Consecutive 6 day practice with allowance for 2 moon days and 4 days for Ladies Holiday (although I concur with Miss Stan that it should be called Bitches Day Off). This means that Menopausal hags like me have a 4 day advantage! What do you win? Good stuff, but I don’t even care, I just love crossing out and counting.
Inside my brain too. I’m am not saying this proudly, but yes I did laugh very loudly. Sorry. Not the sorry that means I regret it, but the sorry politicians use when they are embarrassed in public. Please don’t write me to tell me you dislike. I already decided, right?
My JawboneUP is broken. That’s a cute rubber bracelet that tracks my exercise and my sleep and looks like jewelry. I’ve had it since November, and for us who need accountability, babysitting, and non torturing forms of encouragement, it is a rather cool little gadget. Some people cannot live without their tunes/podcasts/ipod, I need my jawboneUp. and my iphone, and my macbook air. That is how I know that we are well on our way to being cyborgs. I have contacted customer support through email, twitter, FB, and phone(this is new, in the past-if it broke it must be my fault/I deserve it plus I hate conflict). So proud of myself for not walking away. Getting resolution by the end of business today. Like they say in Spanish: “El que no llora no mama” Those that don’t cry don’t get suckled (breastfed! okay? in case I have sophomoric readers).
No it is not about yoga. I am beginning to think that those of us who had daughters in the late seventies and the early eighties did an awesome job. In spite of ourselves, as it is always the case with motherhood. I am schooled by this woman’s lack of false modesty, useless shame, and by her frank self awareness. The ability to make me roar with laughter is something I am beyond grateful for. Kelly Oxford is among a list of 30 somethings that rock my world. Right there with Mindy Kaling, Jenny Lawson, Choire Sicha (guy), and a bunch of others that I follow on twitter, they make the future seem way less horrible.
Delighted when it did not snow this morning, although I know why. Last night I decided to tape a huge heavy duty garbage bag over the front window of my go cart to see if I could just lift that & the snow instead of stealing my husband’s ice scraper. It is just like with umbrellas, you carry one as a precaution and it doesn’t rain! I also had a very satisfying practice, and by that I mean, I practiced presence and focus successfully even though there were athletic newbies (men!) in the room today. My primary is finally becoming meditative and sometimes it worries me to hear that staying too long in primary might cause injury. I really don’t mind just not going past the first series, while exploring intermediate twice a month with the guidance of my teacher’s led “explorations” just so I don’t feel like I’m a dodger. There are so many things I could improve upon while feeling stable and at home (most of the time). For the first time in my life I do not feel panic about not getting somewhere on time. I guess that is what teacher meant when she said we are never done when I first met her. What that meant is that the joint never closes and the offers never expire.
Could not turn myself off last night. Take two. Anybody else? The usual culprits: wine, caffeine, and sugar are innocent this time. I won’t say that I’m all raw, green & clean but One cup of coffee a day and no booze or sweets is not a recipe for insomnia. Maybe too much screen time? Whatever it is, I am not going to medicalize it (maybe not a word). I read three things today that encouraged me to be with what is and not feel scammed or worse, that I am the culprit. Like Ray says: It is what it is. It takes a lifetime to understand that where you are is where you are supposed to be. That’s how reality sort of works. Thig number one:
Thing number two:
Small Blue Pearls which joyfully led me to
Thing number three:
It is not a Maze!
The best part of going to AYC this year was getting a taste of what that concept of taking refuge means. Many Buddhists chant: While on the path to enlightenment, I go to refuge to the Buddha, I go to refuge to the Dharma, I go to refuge to the sangha. AYC was my sangha, The teacher’s sharing of their memories and knowledge was my dharma, and the Buddha like everybody knows is everywhere. When I needed it the most, I took refuge in my practice, and it embraced and sheltered my like the most tender grandmother. I figured this out while sharing a little bit of what went on this weekend with my fellow shala mates. I left for San Diego in the middle of crazy time, and the only option on how not to think obsessively about what could go wrong was to go inward and think of nothing else but the practice session. I always wondered if I was going to ever experience going inward during an entire practice. Nothing like a sh*t storm to make your wishes come true. I even had a little bit of fairy dust left for today’s 1/2 primary, even with the tightest back ever, courtesy of cramped air travel. Nice to be home. Next weekend- now don’t hate me- Tim Feldman at The Yoga Shala in Georgetown CT. There are still some openings for the whole workshop or for just one session if that is what works for you.
I already feel as I’m typing this that Mercury might feel taunted and come and bite my big behind. I am having the best week ever people. My teacher gave me Setu Bandhasana today and then said something like: That’s the last pose of Primary, congratulations, and gave me a little squeeze. I love getting teacher pats in the back. My travel companion for AYC gave me the loveliest gift today because she remembered I had admired it on her wrist, and because I had told her a couple of days earlier that MY DAUGHTER IS GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW!! She told us last week to be ready to go to city hall this week to “make this shit legal”. Let’s say Magdalena is not a traditional gal. Her mom bought her every feminist children’s book published in the 80′s and her great aunt had to buy her a Barbie behind my back, and kept it as their secret for several months. She was not on board with the whole girl power thing until her late teens, but boy did she outdo me. I am terrified of my and Ray’s older relatives reaction, but simultaneously relishing it. So we can’t even buy lunch tomorrow because she does not want any semblance of “the bride’s family has to dish out cash so the groom will take her” But she did agree that we could buy bubbly and I have four bottles of stuff I’ll probably won’t have a chance to afford again anytime soon. And the next morning, off to San Diego at the crack of dawn. Thank you life! How convinced am I that no non-yogis or family reads this blog huh???